CHAPTER 1...
What Will You Do When You Retire?
Introduction
"Old age ain't for sissies, honey." -- Bette Davis
Many Americans already in midlife will live from one-quarter to one-third of their lives after the traditional retirement age of 65. So, even if after you officially retire you continue to work part-time, travel widely, and participate in sports or other leisure activities, you will have plenty of time to do many other things. After talking to hundreds of older people, I'm convinced that the degree to which most people's retirement years are fulfilling has a great deal to do with how they spend this large chunk of discretionary time. People who are busily involved in a wide variety of activities -- both mental and physical -- are likely to do well. This probably doesn't surprise you. But what you may never have considered -- and something that could even make you rethink how you spend time today -- is that if you wait until retirement to start looking for interests that will happily occupy you, it may be too late. Put more bluntly, unless you develop habits of the mind, body, and heart in midlife that will allow you to lead a healthy, interesting, and socially connected retirement, you risk becoming one of those bored and boring old farts you walk around the block to avoid.
Next: A. Plan to Keep Busy
Many retirees report experiencing a paradoxical situation. On the one hand, they have the sense that time is short and their life is running out. On the other, they don't have anything interesting to do after lunch. Even the most avid fisherman, gardener, traveler, or dog lover is likely to find plenty of time to both follow this passion and do many other things -- including, if she isn't careful, becoming bored, depressed, and prematurely dependent on others. As my friend Babette Marks, now in her 80s, puts it,
The ability to maintain an active involvement in life in a number of different ways is one key to leading a decent life when you're older. Face it, what else have you got? Your health probably isn't great, half your old friends are dead, and you don't recognize yourself in the mirror. If you don't keep interested and involved with lots of activities and interests, you'll end up a depressed old vegetable.
Babette is as right as she is blunt. In my observation, most people -- especially those who have been busy earlier in life -- make a successful transition to a reasonably fulfilling retirement if, and only if, they stay busy doing things that reinforce their sense of self-worth. Typically this means being involved with others in activities they feel are meaningful. Everything from selling Girl Scout cookies to having sex can work. But it can also mean participating in highly absorbing solitary endeavors such as skiing, playing music, or reading a wonderful book. However, I can't find anyone in their 60s and 70s who tells me it's fun to spend most of their time watching TV, sitting on a park bench, or sleeping late. And even many people who are more active -- jogging, walking, bike riding, or swimming -- report that continually doing these routine things alone can quickly become joyless. Although I can point to no study that proves it, I'm convinced that people whose lives revolve almost exclusively around solo activities seem to be sicker and more depressed and tend to die sooner than those who are more actively involved with life....more
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